Hazel Bauman

Autistic occultist & stubborn-minded librarian

“A little learning is a dangerous thing
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring:
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,
And drinking largely sobers us again.
Fired at first sight with what the muse imparts,
In fearless youth we tempt the heights of arts
While from the bounded level of our mind
Short views we take nor see the lengths behind
But more advanced behold with strange surprise,
New distant scenes of endless science rise!”

—Alexander Pope

“One receives as reward for much ennui, despondency, boredom—such as a solitude without friends, books, duties, passions must bring with it—those quarter-hours of profoundest contemplation within oneself and nature. He who completely entrenches himself against boredom also entrenches himself against himself: he will never get to drink the strongest refreshing draught from his own innermost fountain.”
—Friedrich Nietzsche

“I have always suspected that too much knowledge is a dangerous thing. It is a boon to people who don’t have deep feelings; their pleasure comes from what they know.”
—Margaret Caroline Anderson


Physical Profile

Slightly but not exceptionally short. Below average weight for her build. Someone who doesn’t practice fitness so much as avoid it through conscientious eating—as if you’d ever catch her in a gym, though you’d probably catch her in a foot chase. Her eternal fortune to be born in the twentieth century. Slender, nimble fingers, able to pinch pennies with a miserliness rivaling Scrooge’s own. Moderately attractive face—symmetrical features, smooth if pale skin, clean and straight teeth. Shoulder-length black hair. It’s either healthy and rich or just a little greasy. Her secret, if one were to consider it the former, is that she doesn’t use shampoo or conditioner. Don’t you know it’s just a marketing scheme? People did fine without it until the 20th century. Besides, it saves money. Gray eyes framed by a thick pair of glasses. Blind as a bat without them. Often downturned reading over a book and ignoring the rest of the world. Functional wardrobe that adapts as necessary to the seasons—turtlenecks and scarves in winter, sun dresses in summer. Evident yen for dark clothing—blacks, grays, navy blues. No yellows or pinks, ever. Generally eschews scents and cosmetics, ostensibly out of protest against the cosmetics industry, actually out of miserliness (the cost adds up) and sloth (so does the time spent in front of a mirror every morning).

Her eyes aren’t hazel. They’re gray. Don’t ask why her parents picked the name.

Demographical Profile

Name: Hazel Calloway Attila* Bauman
Gender: Female
Race: Mixed (3/4ths Caucasian, 1/4th Asian)
Date of Birth: November 19th, 1974 (San Francisco, California)
Date of Awakening: October 10th, 1998 (Witiko Falls, Idaho)
Age: 23
Height: 5’4"
Weight: 110 lbs
Eye Color: Gray
Hair Color: Black
Complexion: Pale

* Hazel’s second middle name is typical for residents of Witiko Falls, who often bear such ones as Nergal, Lamia, Mephistopheles, or Nimrod. Most non-natives of the town find the custom decidedly peculiar.


Historical Profile

“Slow down. You’re going too fast.”

“I’m ten under the speed limit.”

“I know. It’s just-”

The remaining words are cut off by the sudden jolt, deafening metallic screech, and exploding airbags. As an ambulance’s flashing lights bathe the car’s smoking wreckage in a surreal red haze, a bruised and shaking woman clutches a screaming toddler to her breast. A young man in a deputy’s uniform murmurs words of comfort and tries to help the EMTs do their job of examining the two survivors. The three-year-old won’t remember much beyond what her mother, and the rescuer who becomes her father, tell her about that traumatic night. Even after a bitter divorce, they’ll still agree that it’s for the best she doesn’t remember.

But she’ll remember what the locals, the real locals with the mismatching eyes, say with those faint smiles and amused winks.

The roads have a will of their own.

Player’s Note: The below is a somewhat tidied up Hangouts conversation where Hazel’s history was hashed out with the GM. A proper in-character biography may follow, but don’t count on it.

Hazel was born in San Francisco to parents who were traveling through Witiko Falls on vacation. Perhaps due to the usual nature of the roads, or perhaps just a simple freak accident, they got into a car crash that killed Hazel’s father Richard. Her mother, Lydia, was badly hurt but survived. A local deputy named Harvey was one of the on-site responders who helped out the two survivors, and a Florence Nightingale effect while Lydia was bereaved led to them falling in love. She re-married Harvey, who legally adopted Hazel and has been her dad ever since. The accident happened early enough (Hazel was only three) that she doesn’t recall her biological father, which also makes the family’s current relationship problems all the more sad.

Hazel also had problems of her own. At a young age, she was diagnosed with autism (albeit high-functioning) and never developed many friends or extra-familial attachments. Like many lonely youth, she turned to… not deliberately investigating, so much as just being curious about and looking into the town’s paranormal phenomena. She never felt normal or accepted, so she gravitated towards the strange, bizarre, and macabre to establish an identity and sense of self-worth that wasn’t dependent upon the acceptance of her peers.

She did have a stable home environment—which might have been good or bad: good in that it provided an anchor to stop her from getting sucked all the way in by the town’s lurking horrors, or it might have been bad in that she never felt the need to “leave the nest” and make friends her own age when she had supportive, loving parents. She was always out there, but not too out there. She wasn’t the kid who would kill peoples’ pets and smoke in the girls’ bathroom so much as a social recluse who would skip the school dance to read Machiavelli.

In any case, Hazel never applied herself very hard to anything outside her own personal interests. She would happily stay up to 2 AM reading about crop circles on the internet, but that biology assignment, eh. Which ties in to one of her vices—laziness. Part of said lack of interest in academia may have been due to feeling isolated, or being smart enough to coast by with a minimum of work, or the simple difficulty with motivation and performing well in a classroom setting that children with ASD often face. While, again, she wasn’t the sort of kid to kill pets and smoke in the bathrooms, she would, say, adamantly refuse to change her desk location when everyone in the class was supposed to (like most children with autism, she became and still becomes easily set in her ways), and cause an embarrassing scene when the teacher had to personally explain why she needed to move while everyone else awkwardly watched.

Adolescence, unsurprisingly, was an especially awkward time for her. She already wore glasses, and also had to deal with getting braces, acne, and weight gain. Her first period happened in the middle of a math test. She was never really actively bullied, though, so much as she just didn’t fit in. Again, the sort of person to simply eat a home-packed lunch in the library rather than get beat up for lunch money in the cafeteria line. Maybe she would have, if she’d been there, but she was never in line. Part of that may also have been due to her dad, who eventually became the town undersheriff and would have swiftly put a stop to any bullying (that, and she never felt any compunctions against running to authority figures—she never quite grasped, or perhaps cared, that it cost her peers’ respect).

Hazel’s parents, in any case, had been experiencing marital problems by the time she was 14. Severe enough they wanted a divorce, but they settled on not separating until she was 18 (fearing, wrongly or not, that with her ASD and panic attacks, she wouldn’t be able to handle such severe change), and basically living in their house together as roommates rather than a married couple. Their intentions were benign, as they wanted to provide a stable home environment during an already difficult time for their daughter. She was slower on the uptake than other children her age, but even she realized how odd it was (when someone else pointed it out to her) that her parents maintained separate bedrooms when they hadn’t before.

Like many children from divorced homes, she blamed herself, wondering if her parents’ troubles were because of her. That blame/awareness combined with her poor social skills also didn’t help the family’s existing problems, which were starting to get really ugly. Her father eventually realized things weren’t working and finalized the divorce. That was (eventually) to the relief of all, but Lydia came to bitterly regret her decision to move to Witiko Falls and marry Harvey, who she couldn’t remove from her and Hazel’s lives (as he’d legally adopted the latter and had full parental rights). Meanwhile, Hazel was soon to enter high school, and her dad took the moment to tell her all the things she was doing wrong (not using deodorant, wearing sweatpants instead of jeans), and basically the spun the divorce and new school as a chance to reinvent herself. Which she partly did. She did skip prom to look up crop circles, but she learned to blend in instead of dwell apart (even if she never quite felt she belonged). She even managed to join the Lucid Dreaming Club, where she was able to relate to other students on the basis of shared interests.

College was both better and worse. She could’ve gone to a big city many states away, but she chose Spokane’s Gonzaga University. Her maternal grandparents lived there (so she’d visited a bunch of times), it was only a several-hour drive away from her parents in Witiko Falls, and her mom being an alumnus helped her get in with less than stellar grades. So she didn’t quite stretch herself as far as she could have, but experiencing life outside the small, weird town of Witiko Falls and among new people was still something she likely needed. At the same time, her lack of motivation also hurt her—with many of her childhood interests revolving around the paranormal, she wasn’t sure what she wanted to major in or do with her life. She liked reading, but she didn’t want to become an author, because she’d never had the self-discipline to write anything of appreciable length. She liked coding and working on computers, but didn’t want to become a programmer for largely the same reasons. She liked films, but she didn’t want to move to Hollywood because she knew the Hollywood life wasn’t for her. She liked writing, but she didn’t want to become a professor and deal with the hassle of teaching other people. She liked psychology, because she wanted to gain more understanding into her own behavior, but she heard you should only go into the field if you want to help other people. Disliking academia, and not sure what to do with her life, she settled for earning a bachelor’s in English and working as an online adjunct instructor for North Idaho College in Coeur d’Alene. A year later, she wasn’t happy—few friends, fewer ambitions, and no distractions from any of those facts.

She moved back to Witiko Falls in September of the current year (1998) to be close to her parents again, and secured a job as the local high school’s librarian—which she’s imminently due to start. So there’s the element of familiarity plus also reacquainting herself. She’s old enough to feel apart from the students, but young enough that high school’s memories are still pretty fresh. By virtue of her asociality and sloth she hasn’t necessarily yet reconnected with any of her former non-family acquaintances she knows.

In any case, she has no grand goals or ambitions for herself—in the “real world” at least. She has no motivation to obtain further education without a clear use to put it towards (and frankly, she doesn’t like the work inherent to academia). But with a stable living situation and no plans for the future, she feels devoid of purpose. And some of the town’s mysteries are starting to seem a lot more funny after she’s spent four years in a city that elects homecoming kings instead of satyrs, and the high school library doesn’t have the complete works of Marquis de Sade.

She’s remained stagnant in many ways since her teen years, but she has grown in others. And so she wants to find out—possibly not even consciously, but no less fervently—what are the town’s secrets? What makes it so weird? She doesn’t want to find out those answers because she’s a hero who wants to better anyone’s lives (the folk of Witiko Falls seem to live just fine lives), or even because she’s determined to “learn the truth.” Instead, her motivation for looking into the town’s dark corners may be the most dangerous of all: boredom. Something to fill the void. Curiosity born of laziness. While it would be premature to say Hazel has squandered her life, she certainly has the potential to—if she doesn’t pull back from the rabbit-hole before it’s too late.

Psychological Profile

Hazel was socially awkward as a child and had few friends. She gravitated towards the strange and macabre as a means of establishing a self-identity that was not contingent on the acceptance of her peers. She was never antisocial so much as asocial, preferring to research crop circles on prom night than to kill classmates’ pets and smoke in the girls’ bathroom. As a result of her peculiar interests, natural intelligence, and the executive functioning difficulties brought about by her ASD, she never applied herself very hard to academia (or many other things in life). Hazel can come off as lazy and unmotivated, but this belies the obsessive degree to which she can become fixated with subjects that engage her interest—such as Witiko Falls’ paranormal phenomena. Perhaps when she lays the town’s mysteries bare, she will be able to devote her life to a more worthwhile purpose—if those mysteries don’t swallow her whole.

Cognitive Aptitude: Hazel’s long-term memory, quantitative reasoning, and reading and writing ability are outstanding and a source of significant personal pride to her. Her emotional intelligence is lower but has improved over the years—her ability to understand and relate to others does not come to her intuitively, but as a result of deliberate study. Her fluid intelligence, short-term memory, and reaction time speed are dismal. Put another way, she is poor at “thinking on her feet” and adapting to changing circumstances. To people she meets for the first time, Hazel can either come off as profoundly intelligent or inflexible, inattentive, and inarticulate.

Language: Hazel can be given to using formal and archaic-sounding language such as “I have no quarrel with you,” or “this course is folly.” She consciously tries to avoid using such modes of speech, but the habit comes through in situations where she is forced to think on her feet. When she is especially surprised, upset, or flustered, her speech can move from oddly archaic to plainly awkward, such as asking “Do you want to exchange names?” to someone she wants to make friends with. She also avoids using contractions in her speech when she is angry or afraid. She is considerably more articulate when she has time to mentally prepare herself for a situation, and is better at communicating through the written than the spoken word. In time, the proliferation of the internet will prove a great boon to her.

Morality: Hazel has a utilitarian “greatest good for the greatest many” approach to morality. She readily accepts the notion that two wrongs can make a right, especially where she herself is personally concerned—she will happily commit such actions as shoplifting cosmetics for a job interview because she considers it unfair women are so judged for their physical appearances. Due to her autism, empathy for others does not come naturally to Hazel and she can commit callous actions out of simple ignorance that what she’s doing could harm anyone.

Hazel draws a hard line at committing deliberate harm upon people who have done no wrong. Serious crimes such as assault, robbery, and murder simply do not make sense to her on an empathic level. Hazel desires to be left alone, to leave others alone, and doesn’t understand why the rest of the world can’t view things the same way—there’d be a great deal less unnecessary conflict, wouldn’t there?

Hazel is extraordinarily devoted to family members and those few outside individuals (currently, none) she can bring herself to similarly care about. She would think little of dropping a promising career and moving a thousand miles if that was the cost for coming to the aid of a friend if need. Her loyalty is not easily earned, but once extended it knows few bounds.

Personal Interests: Hazel is a voracious reader with a particular appetite for historic fiction, science fiction, and horror, but she considers her interests in these genres “recreational” next to the writings of Parsons, Crowley, Dee, and other occult authors. She is also a somewhat less devoted film buff. Her favorite genres are noir and horror, but she also enjoys the very odd romantic or screwball as a “guilty pleasure.” She considers Scarecrow a place that has “character,” unlike the video stores she saw in Spokane.

Hazel has a more than passing enthusiasm for computer programming, but doesn’t have any desire to pursue it as a vocation; she just likes being able to interact with a world that’s built purely on numeric logic and allows her to interact with people through the written word.

Hazel was clumsy as a child and abhors most forms of physical activity, especially competitive organized sports. Two exceptions to her dislike are bicycling and long walks, which are the primary means by which she stays in shape.

Religion: Hazel is a materialist and does not believe in God or any other higher power whose existence cannot be empirically substantiated. She likes the idea of religious faith—that the universe is ultimately benevolent and good people get what’s coming to them after they die. She cannot, however, bring herself to believe without material proof.

Sexuality: Hazel is heterosexual. Like many teenagers with autism, she was a late bloomer and had her first boyfriend when she was seventeen. They broke up before they could go “all the way,” so in college she felt especially pressured into losing her virginity. Her first time was at a dorm party with a lot of alcohol and left her with mixed feelings. The experience didn’t make her feel any more “normal” so much as more acquainted with what “normal” was supposed to be, and that turned out to be something she didn’t enjoy. She regrets that her first partner wasn’t someone she was close to and consequently seeks to become emotionally intimate with potential boyfriends before becoming physically intimate.

Quirks:Birthdays: Hazel dislikes celebrating her birthday. It reminds her she’s getting older and not going anywhere in life. She has not told anyone else of the dislike.
Contacts: She uses glasses partly out of sloth (they’re faster to put on and take off), inflexibility (she’s always worn them), and dramatic potential (she could lose them on a botch or at some other inconvenient time).
Drinking: Hazel still finds alcohol “icky.” She’ll drink around others when it’s socially expected, but not on her own time and dime.
Driving: Hazel does not know how to drive. This is partly due to her greater then-asociality and rejection of traditional teenage culture/rites of passage, but operating cars also makes her nervous after what happened to her biological father. Her miserliness, finally, plays into it as well. Riding a bike is cheaper and healthier.
Music: Her favorite genres are classic rock and ‘80s pop. She also has a soft spot for classical German composers.
Names: Hazel is terrible at remembering peoples’ names. She always forgets them.
Nostalgia: Her favorite decades are the ‘30s and ’40s. She believes there was more class and decorum in that era. (She’s only half-serious, though. She’ll happily take the present day where women have more civil rights.)
Singing: Hazel enjoys singing in the shower. She is not particularly skilled at it, but finds it easier to believe so with an audience of one.
Smoking: Hazel hates smokers. She will plug her nose whenever she is in the presence of a lit cigarette, hold her breath, and not resume breathing until she is a safe distance away.
Theft: Hazel always shoplifts tampons. She considers it patriarchal they are subject to a tax and viewed as luxury items.

Genealogical Profile

Hazel is slow to develop close attachments to others. Possessed of poor social skills as a child, she has grown better at small talk and reading nonverbal cues as a young adult, but those learned skills can slide away when she is surprised or upset. She remains very close to her parents (usually seeing each several times a week) but has few, if any, real friends around her own age.

Paternal Relatives

Harvey_small.jpgHarvey Bauman
Undersheriff of the Bonner County Sheriff’s Department and former Kelpies’ QB and Satyr. Harvey legally adopted Hazel when she was four, and she consequently does not consider or refer to him as her stepfather, as he is the only male parental figure she’s ever known. Although Hazel would never tell him so, she considers him less intelligent than her mother and thus does not feel as pressured to “make something of herself” by him. Indeed, Hazel has always been a “daddy’s girl” and still frequently goes to her father for advice and support. Her appetite for petty theft has caused him headaches ever since her adolescent years, however.

2017-05-07__6_.jpgLiselotte “Lottie” Bauman
German immigrant. Jonas’ mother, Harvey and Winifred’s paternal grandmother, and Hazel’s paternal adoptive great–grandmother. Mute and wheelchair bound after a stroke.

2017-05-07__7_.jpgJonas “Gramps” Bauman
Recreational fisher, Korean War vet, and local folklore expert–sympathizer. Widower, Harvey and Winifred’s father, Lottie’s sole surviving child, and Hazel’s adoptive grandfather.

2017-05-07__3_.jpgWinnifred “Winnie” Krueger
Nurse manager at Mount Pelion General Hospital and mother of two. Sister of Harvey Bauman, adoptive paternal aunt to Hazel.

2017-05-07.jpgRandy “Mack” Kreuger
Truck driver. Winifred’s husband and father of Russell and Simon. Brother–in–law to Harvey Bauman, adoptive paternal uncle to Hazel.

2017-05-07__2_.jpgRussell Kreuger
Older son of Winnie and Randy Krueger. Student at Lame Bull Middle School. Adoptive cousin to Hazel.

2017-05-07__4_.jpgSimon Krueger
Younger son of Winnie and Randy Krueger. Student at Eugene Bake Elementary. Adoptive cousin to Hazel.

VicePrincipalLeopoldSchoening.jpgLeopold Schoening
Holocaust survivor, Vice Principal of Academics at Witiko Falls High School, and Hazel Bauman’s adoptive second cousin twice removed. She calls him “uncle” for short.

Maternal Relatives

Lydia.jpgLydia Calloway
Corporate lawyer formerly employed by Nostrum Enterprises and now by Mencken & Smithwick. Widow, Harvey’s ex-husband, and Hazel’s mother. Well-educated, confident, and successful, Hazel sees her mother as the sort of woman she could (have?) become but hasn’t, a swan to her own not-fully-outgrown ugly duckling. Although Hazel maintains a close relationship with her mother, she is more likely to confide any anxieties pertaining to her future and personal accomplishments in her father.

Sylvia_Calloway_Small.jpgSylvia Calloway
Hazel’s maternal grandmother in Spokane. Homemaker.

Personae_Small.jpgSylvia’s husband (name unknown)
Retired prosecuting lawyer at the Tokyo Trials. Hazel’s maternal grandfather in Spokane.

Chronological Profile

Year Age Events
1948 - Lydia is born in Spokane.
1959 - Harvey is born in Witiko Falls. Lydia is 11.
1974 0 Lydia enrolls in law school. Hazel is born in San Francisco on November 19th. Lydia is 26 and Harvey is 15.
1975 0 Hazel turns 1 in November. Lydia is 27 and Harvey is 16.
1976 1 Hazel turns 2 in November. Lydia is 28 and Harvey is 17.
1977 2 Lydia graduates from law school and has her picture taken alongside Hazel and Richard. Harvey graduates Witiko Falls High School and joins the Bonner County Sheriff’s Department as a deputy. Hazel turns 3 in November. Lydia is 29 and Harvey is 18.
Played Flashback (December): Hazel spends a Christmas party hosted by her parents staring at a static-playing TV.
1978 3 Hazel’s family takes a road trip to visit her grandparents in Spokane and passes through Witiko Falls for reasons not fully clear to Hazel. The family gets into a car crash that supposedly kills Richard; Hazel learns the true circumstances of his death later. Hazel and the widowed, badly injured Lydia are stuck into Witiko Falls for the time it takes the latter to recover; Lydia meets and falls in love with Harvey, one of the crash’s on-scene responders. The two marry shortly before Hazel turns 4 in November. Hazel is legally adopted at some later undetermined point by Harvey. Lydia is 30 and Harvey is 19.
Played Flashback (January): Hazel witnesses her family’s car crash in Witiko Falls and her first father’s resultant death.
Played Flashback (February): Hazel attends her first father’s funeral with Harvey and Richard’s Awakened friends. ROSEWATER kills or captures the latter; Harvey strikes a devil’s bargain to serve as their puppet in return for being allowed to return Hazel to Lydia.
Played Flashback (November 19th): Hazel celebrates her fourth birthday at Lacewood. Marilyn Sweeney’s murder prompts the closing of the Atwoods’ amusement park.
1979 4 Hazel starts preschool in December. She turns 5 in November. Lydia is 31 and Harvey is 20. Hazel’s family moves out of the GI House to Sisyphus. Harvey becomes the undersheriff for Bonner County a mere two years after graduating police academy, thanks to what Hazel later suspects as ROSEWATER’s intervention.
Played Flashback (September): Haazel and her parents go on a camping trip. She has her first panic attack upon encountering a rabid animal that Harvey shoots.
Played Flashback (undetermined): Harvey takes Hazel to a laundromat.
1980 5 Hazel attends preschool from January to June and kindergarten from September through December. She turns 6 in November. Lydia is 32 and Harvey is 21.
Played Flashback (undetermined): Hazel’s family moves to Sisyphus Manor. She discovers a trove of antique brooks in her new bedroom.
Played Flashback (undetermined): Lydia takes Hazel to a laundromat.
1981 6 Hazel attends kindergarten from January to June and 1st grade from September through December. She turns 7 in November. Lydia is 33 and Harvey is 22.
1982 7 Hazel attends 1st grade from January to June and 2nd grade from September through December. She turns 8 in November. Lydia is 34 and Harvey is 23.
1983 8 Hazel attends 2nd grade from January to June and 3rd grade from September through December. She turns 9 in November. Lydia is 35 and Harvey is 24.
1984 9 Hazel attends 3rd grade from January to June and 4th grade from September through December. She turns 10 in November. Lydia is 36 and Harvey is 25.
1985 10 Hazel attends 4th grade from January to June and 5th grade from September through December. She turns 11 in November. Lydia is 37 and Harvey is 26.
Played Flashback (late school year): Hazel is forced to work on a group science project with Abby Sormurson.
Played Flashback (summer): Hazel watches The Time Machine at the Scarecrow Cinema with her father.
1986 11 Hazel attends 5th grade from January to June and 6th grade from September through December. She turns 12 in November. Lydia is 38 and Harvey is 27.
1987 12 Hazel attends 6th grade from January to June and 7th grade from September through December. She turns 13 in November. Lydia is 39 and Harvey is 28.
1988 13 Hazel attends 7th grade from January to June and 8th grade from September through December. She turns 14 in November. Lydia is 40 and Harvey is 29.
Played Flashback (undetermined): Harvey burns Hazel’s collection of antique books upon discovering their sexually explicit content. Hazel witnesses the first major fight and physical altercation between her parents.
1989 14 Hazel attends 8th grade from January to June. Hazel’s parents get divorced during summer; Harvey moves back to the GI House while Hazel and Lydia stay at Sisyphus, with Hazel visiting her dad for dinners and every other weekend. Harvey manages to convince Hazel to stop dressing in t before she starts high school. She attends 9th grade from September through December and turns 15 in November. Lydia is 41 and Harvey is 30.
1990 15 Hazel attends 9th grade from January to June and 10th grade from September through December. She turns 16 in November. Lydia is 42 and Harvey is 31.
1991 16 Hazel attends 10th grade from January to June and 11th grade from September through December. Hazel witnesses Layne Tuttle seemingly commit suicide with a revolver in the girl’s bathroom, but is unable to make out her last words. She turns 17 in November. Lydia is 43 and Harvey is 32.
1992 17 Hazel attends 11th grade from January to June.
Played Flashback (February 14th): Hazel goes on a Valentine’s date with Troy Saunders, a popular jock, but finds out that he was dared to by peers. Troy regrets the deception and later introduces Hazel to Lance, her eventual boyfriend.
Hazel’s parents discover she has been lying about her independent PE hours at the end of the school year. They require her to walk between their houses during summer as punishment; she consequently learns to bicycle with Lance’s help.
Hazel attends 12th grade from September through December. Her parents clash over her taking dance or yoga class. Hazel picks yoga but ruins the experience for her mom, who then has her take self-defense with Dorothy Vosburg.
Played Flashback (September): Hazel has a rare conversation with Lydia about her first father.
Hazel turns 18 in November. Lydia is 44 and Harvey is 33.
Played Flashback (December 11th): Lance gifts Hazel with a goldfish in celebration of their nine-month anniversary. They make a crop circle in the Crawfords’ barley field and almost have sex before Kurt Sr. drives them off.
1993 18 Hazel attends 12th grade from January to June. She breaks up with Lance her senior year before prom, which she spends watching movies at her mom’s house. She moves to Spokane to attend Gonzaga University and obtains a private dorm room thanks to the Americans with Disabilities Act. Lydia sells the Sisyphus house (much to Hazel’s chagrin) and moves in to the Ghost Elk Lodge.
Hazel attends college as a sophomore from September through December. She loses her virginity while drunk at a dorm party and is deeply upset when her one-time sexual partner rebuffs her attempts to pursue a relationship; she turns to her parents for emotional support and unwittingly sparks an episode of heavy fighting between them. She turns 19 in November. Lydia is 45 and Harvey is 34.
Played Flashback (undetermined): Hazel and her father clash with Lydia over getting car rides between Witiko Falsl and Spokane.
1994 19 Hazel attends college as a freshman from January to June. Lydia half-persuades, half-strong-arms Hazel to move to an off-campus apartment instead of moving in with her maternal grandparents by offering to pay for room and board, as well as not requiring her to hold a job. After several months of initial awkwardness she manages to befriend her neighbor Lindsay Sutton, largely due to bonding over the latter’s cat.
Hazel attends college as a sophomore from September through December. She turns 20 in November. Lydia is 46 and Harvey is 35.
1995 20 Hazel attends college as a sophomore from January to June, and as a junior from September through December. She turns 21 in November. Lydia is 47 and Harvey is 36.
1996 21 Hazel attends college as a junior from January to June, and as a senior from September through December. She turns 22 in November. Lydia is 48 and Harvey is 37.
1997 22 Hazel attends college as a senior from January to June before graduating with a BA in English. She finds the prospect of earning a master’s degree too much work (“at least this year, Mom”) and works as an online English instructor for Coeur d’Arlene Community College in order to pay bills, Lydia being unwilling to financially support her when she isn’t working towards a degree. Bereft of direction or distraction, she comes to find life as a college graduate dissatisfying. Lydia is 49 and Harvey is 38.
1998 23 Mrs. Griswold is abducted by ROSEWATER in September; Leo and Harvey approach Hazel about serving as the high school’s new librarian. She is concurrently (and seemingly coincidentally) approached by the Sweeneys with an offer to house-sit for the couple while they take an extended overseas vacation. The opportunity to live closer to her parents, occupy her mind with Witiko Falls’ distractions, and the financial incentives (higher salary, free housing) convince Hazel to move back to her hometown. She spends a month getting re-acclimated to life in Witiko Falls, which primarily involves reading books and spending time on her computer without leaving her house (except to see her parents). She is due to turn 24 in November. Lydia is 50 and Harvey is 39.

Hazel Bauman

Witiko Falls: Disillusion Parasomniac Calder_R